I've had an apostrophe, lightning has stuck my brain... No one needs to talk me out of ANYTHING!! They just need to realize that I am too chicken-shit to do it in the first place so no amount of "I wouldn't"s or "you are just going to embarrass yourself"s are going to make a difference. The DS situation made perfect sense in my head... I mean come on, feelings that have been around for YEARS need to be let out.. right? So I told a couple of people and one person in particular made me feel like a serial killer for thinking such a thing. This person was the closest thing i had to a best friend since Jen moved away last year and now i just don't know. Maybe I was looking for someone to just say "YAY! go for it you deserve some happiness in your life..." with out looking too deep. Is that sad? I know it was never going to go anywhere, but for once in my life i actually wanted to try and to have some help. Now the moment has passed and there will never be another one like it. As I look back on that lovely night of drinking and vomit (the two who read this AND were actually there, missed it completely.. and the vomit was not mine) i wouldn't have done it anyways. I'm a hopeless romantic and watch way too many movies. I want it to happen to me, not for me to make it happen. I complain too much... NEXT SUBJECT!!

THE THEATRE

The best things to happen are kinda crap. When Ahn left the theatre suddenly, I was put in a rather nasty position. I didn't want the GM job when Josh left, what made them think I wanted it 2 months later? Never the less, it was thrown in my lap. The funny thing is that it could have been SOOOOOOOOOO much worse. The same day the Ahn left, Dan came in and I told him what had happened. He took a second, cursed a few times and then was quite. A short while later he said he was going to leave too... which would have left me as the only manager of the theatre the week of Christmas. I told him ok, and then went outside to release some feelings... alright, I screamed my head off and then cried. I was outside for about 20 minutes and then came back in and told him to go if he really wanted to. Turns out (as you might have guessed) he didn't leave. I don't know what his motives were for staying but I really don't care. Summer hit and Chris returned. He talked to me on the phone before he came home and said that he wasn't going to be returning to school after the summer. PERFECT! Some one I YAY! The worst things for the theatre... Joel and Jaime. blech... The only reason we promoted Joel is because he had training on the projectors and seniority. BAD IDEA!!! The very little power he had went right to his head. He started treating the (best ever) employees like crap and making really bad choices when it came to the customers. Then it got even worse. The first time Jaime left, I flat out told Josh that if he hired Jaime again, i would quit. I meant it!! This time, i was out voted and I am quite sure that the theatre could not have taken the lost of another GM so quickly. We needed her to fill the opener spot that Joel worked. I don't want to get into details, they make me sick. She knows (she has too) that no one liked her... at all... ever. Whatever! I don't have to see her ever again. yay for me. (side note: they both have new jobs, what kind of crap is that?)

EVERYTHING ELSE

Is it sad that my life this last year is divided into only 2 categories?

Sara at church moved away just as I was starting to like her after getting over terrible jealousy. I did get her job though, which isn't much but it is sure alot of fun.
Moved into a new place after living with mold and neighbors who were on a first name basis with the cops that came so often. No more mold and a land lady that likes to talk and sings opera at 2 o'clock in the morning... hmm, sometimes i miss the crack head.. at least he leaves me alone.
No best friend here in Sarasota, she moved to Coral Springs which is a terrible drive from here. 3 hours... too long. Way fun when she comes to visit though.

There is something I'm missing... what is it... oh yeah... LOST MY JOB!! i forgot. The theatre is closed for good, and I am waiting for people to call me back about applications. I hate waiting.

I'm still alive and i still have my family. My mom still loves me and both my sisters tolerate my presence when I am in town (love you guys!). I have a handsome nephew and three beautiful nieces. Two brother-in-law that take care of my sisters. I have a roof over my head and friends here in town that will feed me if i ever run out of food. I have it good no matter what is written above.

Happy New Years.. I'll make this one better than the last one... maybe even find a boyfriend, all by myself.


(btw: sorry for any grammatical errors in this post.. i was going fast and not checking my work)